I’m feeling extremely funkalicious right now.  And when I say “funkalicious”, I don’t mean in the cool way.  It’s a bluesy, slumpy, no shower, multiple cigarette, book reading, mind not stopping day.  Very rarely do I fall into one of these, but I find that lately……well, I’m in a slump.

Overall, things in life are going well.  I finally banished the loser guy out of my life who sucked my emotions and finances dry.  I dumped the job that brought me tears before I even walked through the door and got a new one that I’m happy with.  I’m involved with a couple of different leagues where I get to meet new people each week.

But somehow, I still feel empty.  Per my more recent blogs, you’ve all come to hear about the new flirty cowboy.  I was very excited.  Everything seemed to be flowing well in the beginning, then it started getting weird.  We’d have conversations where I would be kidding about something, and he would miss my humor.  Or he would say something that I took wrong.  It just all started to….not be as cool.  I called him this weekend, left a voicemail and got no response.  So, *sigh*, I think another one has bitten the dust.

Today wasn’t what I was hoping for.  I woke up to driving school for running a red light.  And don’t sit there and judge that I’m a bad driver….it was one of those “oh crap, do I pound the brakes or the gas?” situations.  I chose the wrong one.  Anyway, after driving school, I was still feeling ok until I went home and realized I had an entire day free and was completely broke.  Ugh.  I was feeling the need for retail therapy, but alas, couldn’t make it happen.  Then there was the unreturned phone call from the boy.  Overall, it just wasn’t my day. 

Bear with me, because I know reading this probably hasn’t brought joy to anyone yet.  Lol…..sometimes you just have to get things out, and actually speaking them to someone can be very hard.  It’s easier to type.  I know you all are out there, but you’re not staring at me as I type, wondering what to say, how to respond and try to make me feel better.  Sometimes, the screen is just easier to vent to.

I am 30 years old.  I am unmarried, no kids, really no major baggage other than some self-esteem issues.  I have hobbies, great friends surrounding me, stable work that I enjoy.  And yet, tonight, I am alone.  Not literally…..there are plenty of people in the house.  But I’m alone inside.  I find that no matter what I do, what I accomplish, how well I treat people, it’s never good enough.  The best reference I can think of is an old bible story….talked about the Israelites, who had been freed from slavery, and God said, “Hey, follow me and we’ll head over to this nice paradise to live out your days (the promised land).”  But because they weren’t sure he knew where he was going, they didn’t trust and ended up wandering around out in the desert 40 years before they made it there.  I believe, according to the timetables, it was a 10 day trip, or something like that.

That’s how I feel lately.  Like I’m wandering around aimlessly in a desert.  There is something inside me that feels inert and passive, just waiting for a spark to light so I can figure out where I’m going and actually get to the promised land.  But where is that spark at?  I don’t know what it’s going to take to get me out of this funk.  I keep waiting for one of those miraculous moments that you read about, where some little thing happens in your life to turn it all around and makes you have a new perspective.  “And she lived happily ever after”.  But there’s been nothing.  I feel like my journey is lame.  I sometimes want to ask God, “Why did you give me the gifts you did when I don’t know if I’ll get to use them the way you want?”

A friend explained to me once, “Everything about a person is like two sides of a coin.  On one side, that personality trait has phenomenally good qualities.  But on the flip side, those qualities can be a hindrance as well.”  My best example of that is this:  I think it’s fair to say I have a bold personality.  I’m impatient, I have a really loud laugh, I’ll do anything I can to make you at ease, etc, etc.  These seem like good things to me.  But on the flip side, my impatience runs through all areas of my life, including relationships.  I don’t wait for people to catch up to where I am.  My loudness can come off as brash to those who don’t really know me, and me trying to put you at ease can make me look desperate at times.  Does that make sense?

I don’t really know where I’m going with this ramble, other than to say, “I’m ready for that moment.  As Oprah calls it, that ‘A-ha’ moment…..where everything falls into place, I feel fulfilled and whole, and…….I live happily ever after.” 

Until next time!

Well folks. The wonderful, amazing, company I work for has sent me traveling once again. I won’t go on too much of a rant of all of the reasons why I think it’s the greatest company I’ve ever worked for. That will be saved for a later date. All I’ve gotta say is their new motto should be “Love Mexico? So do we! That’s why we’re shipping your job there”. Outsource and Offshore. Grrrr. (For all of my friends who are reading this, you already hear the sarcasm in this post).

After months of flying US Airways, I was lucky enough to be able to book travel through Southwest this time around. Now I haven’t actually boarded my flight yet but the airport experience has been nothing but greatness so far. No lines when checking my luggage, security took all of about 2 minutes to go through, the nice Southwest employee helped me find my way to the nearest Starbucks and the best part was I went to sit down in one of those chairs that look like the massage chairs you would find in the mall. To my pleasant surprise they were personal chairs that had it’s very own plug and Wi-fi !!! WOW!!! This would have never happened on US Airways.  So here I am, my coffee in hand, in a nice big black comfy chair, WI-FI, & a plug (gotta have a plug because the company laptop I have has about a 3 minute battery span).

Will update soon from Oregon!

Andrea

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

And so are the Days of Our Lives…..   Ok, so to continue from my previous blog….. I lied.  I flat-out lied.  The acquaintance didn’t contact me until Friday afternoon.  I had been sick and out of work on Thursday, so when Friday rolled around and I didn’t want to go out with him, it was easy to say, “Hey, I’m not feeling well still….I’m sorry, but I’m going to bail.”  That’s not such a big deal, right?! Except I didn’t just go home after work.  I went to my home bar and decided I was going to play some pool and chill out.  After an hour or so, I look up and see this fine lookin’ cowboy sitting at the bar…and I mean, fine.    Kind of the young Marlboro man thing….the ladies know what I’m talking about.  (Oh, for those who don’t know, the nun has a serious thing for cute cowboys and always has…..hey, she’s an iowa girl!).  So after a while, the nun and the cowboy begin to chat, nothing serious.  The nun then asks where the cowboy works, and he replies, “The University of Phoenix.” ……………YIPPEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!………………..we work at the same company.  Come to find out, he works two buildings away from mine.  So we exchange emails with the promise to contact each other on Tuesday morning, and he leaves the bar. The nun, not wanting to get her hopes up, because it’s possible the cowboy is a freak or something (hey, you never know anymore) drops the “Hey, nice to meet you, etc, etc) email this morning figuring there might be a small conversation.  What she gets back blows her mind.  So the cowboy is openly flirting….and I mean, wow…..flirting.  This is fabulous.  This continues all day long, until the cowboy leaves work with the “We’ll continue this tomorrow” line.  The nun is pleased. So I hate to say it, but cancelling dinner with the acquaintence turned out to be a very, very good thing for the nun.  Probably not the nicest thing she’s ever done, but it still worked out.  Lord forgive me, but what’s a girl to do with a fine cowboy?!?  Lol…… Until next time………………….

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

*Sigh*……well folks, it’s happened.  Sister Mary Meg finally got a little taste of her own medicine, and didn’t like it one bit!  I’ll have to back up a bit to tell the entire story, but this weekend was very…..interesting, to say the least. So I met a new acquaintance/friend a few weeks ago who seemed nice enough.  No spark there or anything, just one of those good acquaintances that you see with the usual crowd.  Well, about a week ago, I’m out with some people at a bar, and the flower lady comes by.  You know, the flower lady that walks up to the single woman, her basket in hand asking, “You want buy flower?”  Um…. “No, I no want buy flower.”  Well, she asks the acquaintance, and lo and behold, I end up, flower in hand. *Awwwwwww, isn’t that sweet.* So while there, Sister Mary Meg has a couple of drinks, and when her group gets ready to leave, the acquaintance leans in to kiss her goodnight. She is stunned but just rolls with it.  Over the next couple of weeks, she sees the acquaintance out at different events, but nothing like that happens again.  The nun is relieved. On Friday, the acquaintance calls and asks if she’d like to go play some darts.  The nun is always up for darts, and agrees to go.  The evening is event-free, and the nun decided to go home.  The acquaintance asks to walk her to her car…. (Red flag, warning, warning!!)…..not wanting to be rude, she allows it.  The acquaintance opens the car door (again, Awwwww) and as she’s putting the key in the car, the acquaintance does the “lean in” again.  Once again, the nun is stuck on the receiving end of the goodnight kiss. So, Sunday night comes around, and the nun heads off to her usual place, and who happens to be there?  That’s right……the nun spends the night being friendly, but also kind of avoiding the acquaintance, because she doesn’t really want the attention he’s giving.  But, as fate would have it, she gets stuck again.  The acquaintance comes up and asks, “Can we talk outside?”  (WARNING, WARNING, BIG RED FLAG!!)  “Um………sure, I guess.” Before I start this last section, let me restate that the nun has only known the acquaintance for about 1 month.  The acquaintance proceeds to railroad the nun into having dinner with him Friday night…..(side note- yes, the nun could have said no, but those who know the nun know that she has no confrontational skills and doesn’t want to come out and say, hey, i really don’t like you).  Then it gets really ugly……..the acquaintance proceeds to tell the nun that he’s madly in love with her and has been ever since he first saw her.  He wants to see her every day, and would put aside other things in his life so he can be with her. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!  THE NUN IS FREAKING OUT!! The nun tries to reason with the acquaintance, saying, “Look, you seem nice, but I’m not really interested in a relationship.  I don’t mind hanging out and getting to know you, but I’m not really wanting to date right now.”  The acquaintance is persistant.  Then he says, “So I suppose you’re going to call off from dinner now that I told you that….” Crap.  What’s a nun supposed to do?  She feels stuck.  So she says, “No, I’ll still go to dinner if you would like to hang out, but just know that I’m not in the same place you are.” *Sigh*……so this is where the story becomes a “To be continued”……the nun IS NOT looking forward to dinner, and all ready has her “out” planned should it get uncomfortable again.  But see, the nun had an epiphany, folks……remember how I said that I like to just be honest and up-front with men?  Well, granted this was a little more exaggerated than something I would do, but I understand now.  People don’t want to hear that much honesty.  They want to circle around the issue, and possibly just avoid it all together if the attention is unwanted.  But when you’re honest, you force people to say things they really don’t want to say to you.  Now I have to be the “Look, I really don’t like you like that” guy.  So, lesson learned.  Sister Mary Meg will curb her “honest” conversations with guys going forward and just ride the vibe that is given. TO BE CONTINUED…………

Have I packed? Nope Have I done laundry? Nope Have I gotten approval from my boss to leave work early tomorrow? Negative. I’m supposed to trade cars with my parents so that I can save on gas. Have I made the trip to Mesa to trade cars? What do you think? NOPE I should be doing laundry right now, but instead I’m blogging about how I should be doing laundry.

I talked with my step mom earlier and she asked what my ETA would be. My response…”No idea”. She asked “what time are you leaving?” My response. “Uhhh…not sure”. She then proceeded to ask “are you still coming?”. My response. “Why by golly, I sure am”.

So one thing is for sure. Yes, I am going. Not sure when or if I will leave with a packed bag of clean clothes but I am going to NM tomorrow.

I’ve added a picture to this blog. It has nothing to do with this blog. This is Patrick and me at the  Valley Ho last weekend.  We had fun.

MEG HERE:

Ok, I know I blog on this subject a lot, but it seems to be a reoccuring issue…..why do people feel it’s okay to be rude?  Seriously!  Can I just speak freely for a moment? 

We (the human populus in general) are a bunch of selfish buttholes (censoring for the kids).  Seriously!  We expect that we don’t need to put out any effort into friendships, relationships, jobs, etc, but we still want the benefits that go along with all those things.  When we cut people off in traffic, it’s because we think our “hurry” is more important than theirs.  When someone tells us, “Hey, give me a call and we’ll hang out” only to avoid answering the phone, they’re telling us that we aren’t really that important in their lives.

I have a….. “friend”…..I guess we’ll actually call them an acquaintance now, who used to be very close to me.  This person and I spent quite a bit of time together, and seemed to enjoy each other’s company.  Lately we’ve drifted, and I’ve continually tried to keep in contact, but my “friend” is ignoring me.  Not only does this hurt my feelings, because I care about this person, but it tells me that they didn’t really value my “friendship” as much as I thought.  That sucks.  So I made one last ditch effort to contact the friend so I could pick up some of my things at their house, stating that we don’t have to be ”buds” anymore, I would just like to get my things and move on.  And even though I know the “friend” got the message, they did not have the courtesy to get back in touch with me.

Folks, I’ve tried to be nice about this.  I really think I’ve made an effort.  But at this point, I’m getting pissed.  My “friend” is just being rude now.  I’m trying to be an adult about all of this, but it’s really hard when the person you’re dealing with is acting like a teenager (to my teen readers, nothing personal).  Why can’t we just be amicable, I’ll get my things, and move on?  It makes no sense to me!!!

Ok, rant over….but my loyal readers, please, for the love of God, make every effort to not be a butthole.  Let’s all be grownups.

1. I used to own an Iguana. Her name was Sebastia. She died. RIP Sebastia -you cute little thing!

2. I used to own two Oscar fish. Harley and Marley. (Harley after Harley Davidson and Marley after Bob). They both died. RIP -you mean gold fish eating fish!

3. I’ve never had a cavity.

4. I’ve never gotten a ticket.

5. Though I’ve never gotten a ticket, I did hit my brothers car while backing out of the driveway. SHHHH. He doesn’t know this!

6. I weigh myself every single morning- it helps keep me on track.

7. I think I would be an awesome private investigator. I’M WATCHING YOU!! MMUAAHHAHHHAHAHA

8. I read between lines VERY well. I’m not as dumb as you think…sometimes I just play the part.

 9. Though I’ve never had plastic surgery, I have had a few minor cosmetic procedures.

10. I’ve never received flowers from a guy. Go ahead…feel free to leave comments on how sorry you feel for me.

So while watching this, Sister Mary Meg got inspired by the fantastic abs these women have.  I mean, these chicks are ripped.  “Well,” Sister Mary Meg thought, “what’s stopping me from having those abs too?”  So in the midst of couch-potato inspiration, she decided to get her lazy butt up and start exercising again.  After heaving her bum off the couch, getting upstairs, and actually putting the workout apparel back on, Sister Mary Meg looked in the mirror…..

“Ok, ew.”  Do you ever have one of those moments where you picture yourself in fantastic physical shape, only to come back to reality and realize you definitely ARE NOT.  Yeah, she had one of those.

However, still inspired, she hauled out her exercise equipment and got to work.  *A side note- about 2 years ago, she was really doing well and dropped a bunch of weight by working out…she actually felt good on a daily basis, and even stopped smoking for a while.*  What happened during this 30 minutes was appalling……everything on her body creaked.  This woman, who used to be flexible, can barely touch her toes anymore.  What a sad moment.

Even after all of this horror, she is still inspired.  She even debated posting up “before” and “after” pictures on her blog site, to hold her accountable through this process.  However, Sister Mary Meg is a little on the shy side when it comes to that stuff.  Maybe in a few months when her abs start to look good again, she’ll be comfortable posting the “before” pictures so you all can see the progress and maybe be inspired yourselves.

So………here’s to gaining energy and losing my gut.  Although it’s going to be a painful process, may it also be a worthwhile one!

Ok, so I think this one deserves being told.  I decide I need to practice some pool last night, considering I’ve started playing in a league and I’m really not that good.  So, I get in my favorite dying mode of transportation, Miss Marilyn, the Wonder Car, and get on the 60 to head into town.  As I’m driving, I notice a cop behind me……then I notice he turned his lights on.  Shit.  So I pull over, and when he comes up, he asks if I knew why he was stopping me. 

*Now, I normally don’t do this, but I played my girlie card as hard as I could.*

“No officer, was I speeding?  I think I was doing the speed limit.”  (Said in my girliest voice.)  His response?….. “No, you weren’t speeding.  Did you know your registration is out of date?”  Shit.  I totally forgot about that.  So what do I do?  I play the girlie card even harder….. “Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, I can’t believe that slipped my mind.  I’ll take care of it asap.” 

Yeah…..for those of you guys who hate that girls get out of tickets using their ‘girlie card’, here’s your payback.  He still gave me the ticket.  Damn.  But he was nice.

So I continued on into my bar to practice pool.  When I get there, the only soul I know is the bartender.  No pool buddies to be found.  So I sit at the bar, relay my cop story and have my coke (as we’re now not going to drink ANYTHING with our registration issue).  While doing this, there is a fabulous looking man sitting next to me who I’ve never seen before.  He’s listening to the story, and we start to chat.  I find that he likes to play darts.  I’m also a big dork, and I’m in a dart league.  So we start playing darts and chatting.  We then exchange numbers so I can get him into our dart league.  Meanwhile, it’s freaky tweaker night at the bar……everyone who is crazy has come out….and I mean everyone.  A guy came in from outside because some guy was out there unlocking his bike, grabbed his bike lock, and whacked this guy across the back.  Out of nowhere….seriously odd.

So, as my night is over, I get back on the 60 and head home.  While driving, I look in the rearview mirror and see……..another cop.  Not kidding, he’s tailing me for at least two more miles.  “Son of a……”.  Just as I’m preparing myself to be pulled over again, he swings out around me and takes off.  Must have gotten a call…..thank you God! 

So there is Sister Mary Meg’s crazy night in a nutshell.  It always has it’s highs and lows, but at least it’s never boring.

So often we try to find our happiness and self worth in people and things. Maybe our happiness comes in a pill form? The stock holders of Prozac, Zoloft and Wellbutrin are very happy indeed. As are the makers of Viagra and Levitra. They give you a pill to “get it up” and another pill to make you feel not so bad that you needed to take a pill to do it.  Or maybe our happiness is found in the things we buy. Retail therapy- gotta love it.  The sales associates at Coach ask how they can “enhance my shopping experience” before I have managed to step more than 3 feet in the door. They are convinced a new Coach purse will bring a smile to my face. Looks like we are about to break out in a chorus of “We are the World” at any moment. Can’t you just feel it now? Will the happiness ever end?

In all seriousness…

I think it is really something to know your own worth and appreciate it without needing other people substantiate it or confirm it. To really love yourself, know yourself and be yourself really is quite possibly one of the most difficult things in life. The truth is that I don’t think anything in this world will make us happy unless we are happy with ourselves.

We want to find worth and happiness by being loved. We want someone to go home to, someone that fills us and will not be whole until we have that person in our life.  We believe if we are single we are an anomaly and that we are worthless. Often to add fuel to the fire, we are asked about our partners or when we are going to get one. Our needs and wants should not equal our worth.  Self worth and respect is more important than anything else, without it the reality is that no matter how much you love something or someone, if it’s purpose is to fill a hole, it will fade, move on and outgrow.

No matter what, we deserve to be loved for who we are. We deserve happiness and we deserve to be and love ourselves in turn. We cannot be true to anyone else until we are true to ourselves, until we know who we really are. Until this happens, nothing in our life will be true, it will only be falsities that will result unhappiness. This is a hurdle that I am making an attempt to jump- I have a feeling it’s going to be a hard process.

~Andrea

“The best way to get over a guy is to get under one!”

Nuff said.

Well, my faithful readers, I’ve done it again.  Once again, Sister Mary Meg has made the leap into a relationship (or non-relationship….we’ll get to that later) and let herself get shit on.  *Sigh*……. I don’t know how I do it, but I seem to have radar for men who are going to give me the “you’re the greatest woman I’ve ever met, but…” line.  Many years ago, I thought it was a problem with “the man”.  However, after multiple times of going through this, I’m beginning to realize the issue is with me.

See, even though I’m not sure if I want to have children, I do know that I am, by nature, a nurturer.  I want to help people.  Whether it be helping them emotionally, physically, etc, I want to be there by that person’s side and help them along.  What I’m starting to realize is that I carry that into my relationships as well.  I’m not sure how it happens, but with every man (and I’m not exaggerating, I mean EVERY man) I’ve ever dated, they always seem stable in the beginning.  Then, inevitably, in the first couple of months, they now have lost all stability in their lives and they are broken.  Hmm…..I know I can’t take the credit/blame for that, but it does make me wonder how I constantly gravitate toward those men.  And, again inevitably, they all give me the same response at the end of it….. “Meg, you’re just awesome, and I don’t know what I’d do without you.  However……..”  Translation- “Yeah, I’m done with you.”

You know, I’m just going to say it…….I’m really getting tired of being used.  And I’m not saying that these men are purposefully doing it, but it is happening.  You see, when I get into a relationship (or whatever you want to call it), I jump in with both feet.  Because I think that’s how it should be with two people….if you are with someone, you should both enjoy being around each other, and look forward to seeing each other, etc, etc.  But once again, I’m the one committing and the other person is saying, “Eh….whatever.”  NO!  This is not okay!

I know from my blogs that I probably sound like a crazy woman, and maybe I am a little.  But overall, I’m a great chick for a guy.  I enjoy watching sports, I want you to have time with your friends without me, I like cooking for a dude, I actually want to hear about your day, I enjoy being……..we’ll call it “intimate”, etc, etc.  So why am I constantly being pushed aside? 

This is the first time in two years that I’ve had any sort of “relationshippy” type thing.  I took time off after my ex and I (of three years) broke things off because I wanted to figure out what I really wanted.  So I took a chance, and dove in again……and got the same results.  So, it sounds like I didn’t evaluate enough in that free time. 

So, if any of my faithful readers (all 2 of you) comes across a man who is stable in his life and willing to dump his baggage and be with a good woman, call me.  But seriously, put them through a thorough interview first, because I don’t think I can do it again.

Soooo, yeah……wow.  What started off as a normal, routine weekend turned into some crazy, crazy shit.  It began with some serious discussion with my guy…I hesitate to even call him that, because I’m trying to give him some room right now and not “label” anything, but I have to call it something.  So for that purpose, I’m just going to call him “my guy”.  Anyway, that was a two day conversation, and I’m still not sure if it’s 100% finished….but, I think we made some progress.  So while dealing with the emotions of that, I arrive at my work Monday morning…let me give some background on my work:  I’ve been miserable there for a few months now.  I’m of the “non-confrontational” variety, and ever since I took over my store, it’s been a “who’s got the bigger balls” fight.  I’m going to admit, I don’t.  I just don’t have the bigger balls.  I am not willing to constantly fight with people to establish my dominance.  It’s not worth it to me.  So, back at the ranch, I arrive at the store Monday to find that all the organizational work I had done the week before had been rearranged by my assistant who thought his way was better.  AAAAARRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!  He erased hours of work in one day, and by the way, it sooooooo was NOT better than what I had.  Anyway, this was the straw that broke the camel’s back…..I’ve been fighting with this asshole for months, and for the past couple, I’ve been putting out resumes looking for something different.  But Monday……oh, Monday did it.  I gave my notice.  I emailed my bosses (very professionally, mind you) and said, “I’m out.”

Now, it’s a day later, and while I’m still happy with the decision, I realized that I don’t actually have the new job yet……I’m coming up on that dreaded word…….unemployment.  Eek!!  And don’t get me wrong….while it would be nice to have a week or two off (haven’t had a vacation in a while), I need to have a job.  So, I have become the “Computer Job-hunting Nazi”.  I’ve applied for EVERYTHING.  So, we shall see what opportunities arise.  I think I’m going to become a trucker.  I’ve even got the name picked out…… “Big Sexy”.  Heeheehee….Does anyone have the number for truck driving school?  (20 bonus points if you can name what movie that is from).

This is Meg, signing off!

So yeah….I feel good, but

Nail me good?  What the heck? At first I laughed and then I just sat there and stared at it. I began to think…. what if I was married and my husband decided to look at our bank statement with a charge that said “nail me good” on it? I have no doubt in my mind that this would cause a little bit of a problemo.  So what do I do? Do I let it go? Do I call and complain? Am I the only one who found this somewhat offensive but funny in a strange and twisted way?  I’m sure these people know the double-meaning of the word “nail” or more likely don’t know the real meaning of marketing. Thoughts?

I still want to be a writer, a singer, a businesswoman, and now I’ve added party planner, office manager, and world traveler to the bill.  (Note- I gave up the gymnast thing when I realized I was going to have boobs and curves, and those aren’t allowed in gymnastics.  I also gave up the dancer thing when I realized I dance like a chicken.)  Basically, I’m going for an Oprah-style world domination.  However, I can’t seem to figure out what I want to do day-to-day.  I mean, don’t most adults have at least a little inkling of what they enjoy doing?  I really don’t.  And I have such a short attention span that I can’t seem to get comfortable in one job for too long.  3 years is my max so far.  I look at people who have worked for a company for over 10 years and think, “How in the hell did you manage that?”  Maybe they have found something they love and want to throw all of their passion into.  I’m yet to find that. 

So I guess what I’m saying is, if any of our readers out there know of a career where I get to have fun all day without getting bored and I get paid really well for it, please let me know and I’ll post my resume.  Until then…….I’ll continue to dream of singing on Broadway while coming home smelling like an onion ring….for now.

-Meg

Meg, describing Dre:  The woman lives and sleeps with her camera.  It doesn’t matter where we are, she is CONSTANTLY taking photos.  If you don’t believe me, I’ll make her put the picture of us riding a metal dinosaur in Gila Bend, AZ outside of a Kwiki-Mart up later.  Andrea greatest downfall (in Meg’s opinion) is her love of vegetables.  Blech!  The woman orders pizza with no meat…..I find that un-American.  One of Dre’s greatest strengths, however, is her penchance for sarcasm.  Side note- neither of us knows what penchance means, but I wanted to use my $45,000 of schooling for something. End side note.  Dre, however, uses her powers of sarcasm for good and not evil, only unrestraining them for those who truly deserve an ass kicking to be dressed down.  Meg thinks Andrea would be the greatest partner in the world, if only she would become a man and grow a penis.  However, Dre is NOT having any of it.  Although, on a drunken camping trip (when I say “drunken”, I mean a 5th of rum), Dre did propose to Meg in an HONORARY lesbian marriage ceremony, and then celebrated by puking ridding herself of said rum.  I know this doesn’t sound like I love and value Dre, however, you couldn’t be more wrong.  She is my person.  For those who don’t know what having a “person” means, I’m not going to tell you.  You should just “get it”.  If you don’t, then you probably don’t have a “person”.  Another side note- Dre is very concerned that I’m making us sound like thespians right now……please understand, I love Dre, but I don’t LOVE HER, LOVE HER.  There is more, but it’s now her turn….enjoy!

Dre on Meg:  First off…let me clarify…although I may be a camera whore, Meg is the one who keeps begging me to take sexy Christmas elf pictures of her and I flat out refuse.  Yes, maybe I did go on a drunken camping trip and downed a 5th of rum, at least I don’t drunk text or dial. My dear friend Meg is the reason I leave my phone at home whenever we go out. Whenever we are durnk   drunk (case in point) she has these bright ideas to call my boss and tell him how much we love him. I’m surprised I still have a job. But this isn’t about me, this is about one of the greatest friends in the world, Meg. Ahhh there are so many reason I love this girl to deah death (drunk blogging…remember?) She is one of the few people in this world who can turn my frown upside down just by hearing her voice. (No, we’re not lesbians- strictly dickly, folks, strickly dickly). I love her, but I don’t LOVE HER, LOVE HER.  I love her because she has helped me to become more secure in my own skin…. the girl goes everywhere naked. Again… I love her, but I don’t LOVE HER, LOVE HER.  She supports my idea of getting breast implants and supports me once again the next week when I tell her that I’ve changed my mind and supports yet once again when I’m back on the big tittie rampage.  She’s so supportive! Anywho, I don’t know if this rant is more about her or me, but I love my girl BFF!

Meg responding to Dre:  Ok, just to clarify…..I don’t go EVERYWHERE necked…..I’m just free in my own home….and in Dre’s home.  And pretty much in any home I’m in……ok yeah, I do go everywhere necked.  But seriously, who wouldn’t want sexy Christmas elf pictures for the yearly Christmas card?  Even if they’re not as sexy as I would believe them to be, at least they’ll bring a smile!!!  Oh, and there’s nothing wrong with drunken dialing…until the next morning.  (Kris R, if you’re out there…..lovin you, man!  hee hee hee)  Oh, and I’ll always be Dre’s breast supporter.  (ok, that just made me giggle….hahahahaha)….

Well folks, this concludes the first edition of theblueandthepink blog.  As you continue to read, you’ll find out where the name was conceived, how we’re feeling ’bout some shit, what we think about men (note- this will change daily), our ponderings of life, liberty, and the pursuit of good men, and just generally quirky thoughts.  We hope you enjoy and stick around!